Announcements!

Greetings, Fans!

TRAVEL!

Pack your bags and inform your boss you’ll be using some vacation time, Tabloia groupies, because you’re going to have to make a lot of travel plans this year, if you want to follow us on our touring schedule!

First up, be sure to come join us at NEW YORK NY’COMIC-CON, at the Jacob Javits Center, this weekend (February 23-25)! It’s not too late to buy those airline tickets, West Coasters! (Although it’s a sell-out show, so it may be too late to get into the show!) You can get con info at:

http://www.nycomiccon.com/App/homepage.cfm?moduleid=2577&appname=100453

Stop by and say hello! We’ll be in artist alley, table A105B! That’s A105B, fans! Later this year, we’ll be visiting San Francisco, Los Angeles, Seattle, San Diego, and Chicago! We also intend to hit a couple more, so keep checking in at our “appearances” page on our website: http://chriswisniaarts.com/appearances.shtml

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TABLOIA NEEDS YOUR VOTE, FANS!

It’s not too late to vote for Chris Wisnia, Dr. DeBunko, Doris Danger, Salt Peter Press, www.chriswisniaarts.com, or myself (Rob Oder!), at the prestigious UK Eagle Awards! Hurry and pop over by clicking http://www.eagleawards.co.uk/nominate.asp to cast your vote! Nominations close February 28!

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DICK HAMMER WEB COMIC NOT PORN!

We want to thank all of you who received our last email (with the heading, “DICK HAMMER WEB COMIC”) … IF you opened the email and read it, INSTEAD OF assuming it was some sick porn spam and deleting it! We also want to thank you if you received the email, assumed it was some sick porn spam, but opened it anyways! And we want to give an extra special thanks to those of you who assumed it was some sick porn email, opened it anyways, and didn’t ask to be removed from the mailer, even after realizing it WASN’T some sick porn spam!

We’ve just posted our anniversary, oft-celebrated “ninth” entry! Keep checking in, fans!

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BLOG PIECE OF @&??*$!
Once again, the controversial “Diary of a Struggling Comics Artist” blog of Chris Wisnia is down due to a combination of technical bull@&??*$ and creator ineptness! The original 83 entries are still available for your perusal, but don’t expect anything new this week, and possibly for a while! Sorry to ruin your weekly websurfing schedules, fans!

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DORIS DANGER IS BACK … IN HUMONGOUS TREASURY STYLE!

You heard it, fans! “DORIS DANGER SEEKS … WHERE URBAN CREATURES CREEP AND STOMP” #1 Unbelievable First Issue, will be submitted next month, for Diamond’s May Previews scheduled for July release!

We’ve solidified the project! We’re looking at over twenty pages of brand new excitement! And as a free bonus, it will ALSO collect both 16-page “pamphlets,” “Doris Danger Greatest All-Out Army Battles” and “Doris Danger in Outer Space!” That means 64-pages of non-stop giant monster action!

What will you get?!? Giant monster pin-ups by MIKE ALLRED, GUY DAVIS, SAM KIETH, JOHN SEVERIN, DICK AYERS, DAVE GIBBONS, PETER KUPER, HERB TRIMPE, PETER BAGGE, SAM GLANZMAN, MICHAEL LARK, JH WILLIAMS III, AL FELDSTEIN, RUSS HEATH, ESAD RIBIC, and MORE??????!

PLUS … front AND back covers by SHAG!

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Join us next mailer, fans, for more exciting details, hype, and propaganda about “DORIS DANGER SEEKS … WHERE URBAN CREATURES CREEP AND STOMP!”

See you then,
Rob Oder,
Editor-in-Chief
www.chriswisniaarts.com
“We’re dynamite!”

Wanna unsubscribe? Why didn’t ya say so? Simply reply to this email, with the header, “Sorry, Chums!”

Tabloia Mailer #9614

Greetings Fans! What a lot of news we have to share (compared to last mailer, when there was literally no news!)!

DICK HAMMER: THE DAILIES

Your favorite Private Investigator, DICK HAMMER, is back on the scene at last, in a “daily newspaper strip”-style web comic – coming to you ONCE A WEEK! (or so)!! Go to www.chriswisniaarts.com, (and check out our HOT new web design!), then click on “DICK HAMMER: THE DAILIES!”

What can you expect of DICK HAMMER: THE DAILIES? Mystery! Murder! Arson! Action! An attempted murder that leaves a man in a wheelchair! Suspense! Not one but TWO cases of amnesia! Mistaken identities! Love gone sour…DEADLY SOUR! THAT is the daily life of DICK HAMMER: PRIVATE INVESTIGATOR!

Ace artistic hack Chris Wisnia, DICK HAMMER’S writer/artist, just finished scripting chapter one of this immense adventure! It’s slotted at 52 entries – but that could expand as he works on the art! You mathematicians may be able to calculate that at our once-a-week-or-so schedule, it will take us A YEAR, JUST to get chapter one out! That’s why we here at TABLOIA WEEKLY MAGAZINE intend for this web comic to win the award for “most excrutiatingly slow-moving web-comic of all time!” See why RIGHT NOW! Go to WWW.TABLOIA.COM and look at how we pull out all the stops … for slow!

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ITEM!

The prestigious EAGLE AWARDS out of the UK have opened their nominations for the best comics of the year! Have no misunderstandings: this first stage of the process is a strict popularity-contest, like nominating your high school Prom King! And as you already know, we at Tabloia Weekly Magazine are the most unpopular nerd in this allegorical high school, and we are crying out to our only (two) friends (YOU! And you!), and desperately begging you both to please vote for us, for Prom King!

Please don’t delay in clicking http://www.eagleawards.co.uk/nominate.asp and voting us in every category, even if it doesn’t apply! We did!

They will ask you to submit your name, email address, age, and country of residence! That means you may feel free to vote for everyone whose name, email, and age you know! Vote for your parents and siblings! For your Grandparents! For six-month-old or two-month-old babies! Ex-girlfriends! They would WANT you to vote for Tabloia!

To make things easy for you, we’ve made a chart of EXACTLY WHAT WE WANT YOU TO VOTE! Why? So you don’t have to think for yourselves! BUT ALSO … because if one of you two fans votes for “Dr. DeBunko” and the other one votes for “Doris Danger,” our two votes will be split, and we’ll technically only get ONE vote! And then someone with the SAME POPULARITY OF TABLOIA (or even someone with THREE FRIENDS) will beat us BY ONE VOTE (or two)! WE CAN’T LET THAT HAPPEN, FRIENDS! (Unless, for some reason, you would prefer to vote for books that YOU actually WANT to vote for! In that case, vote appropriately)! HERE IS WHAT WE WANT YOU TO VOTE:

FAVOURITE COMICS WRITER: CHRIS WISNIA!
FAVOURITE COMICS WRITER/ARTIST: CHRIS WISNIA!
FAVOURITE COMICS ARTIST: PENCILS: CHRIS WISNIA!
FAVOURITE COMICS ARTIST: INKS: CHRIS WISNIA!
FAVOURITE LETTERER: CHRIS WISNIA!
FAVOURITE EDITOR: ROB ODER! (this vote is ESSENTIAL, because as you know, I AM A FICTITIOUS PERSON! I DON’T EVEN EXIST, so who could be a better winner of this award, I ask??!)
FAVOURITE BLACK AND WHITE COMICBOOK: AMERICAN: DORIS DANGER!
FAVOURITE NEW COMIC BOOK: DORIS DANGER!
FAVOURITE COMICS STORY PUBLISHED DURING 2006: DR. DEBUNKO: WHEN HUMAN FLESH BURSTS INTO FLAMES!
FAVOURITE COMICS COVER PUBLISHED DURING 2006: THE LUMP cover by DAMON THOMPSON
FAVOURITE REPRINT COMPILATION: DR. DEBUNKO!
FAVOURITE COMICS CHARACTER: DR. DEBUNKO!
FAVOURITE COMICS VILLAIN: KRAKAPOO! (from DORIS DANGER)
FAVOURITE COMICS-RELATED WEBSITE: WWW.TABLOIA.COM!
FAVOURITE WEB-BASED COMICS: DIARY OF A STRUGGLING COMICS ARTIST! (what the heck? It’s worth a try!)

In our war-torn, politically-ambivalent, confusing, difficult, high-unemployment, crime-ridden world, the most important, most AMERICAN step you can take is, of course, voting for your favorite comic for a British Comic Award! THANKS for doing your part! That’s http://www.eagleawards.co.uk/nominate.asp , fans!

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REVIEWS!

My how the reviews continue to flood in!

Nice review of the DORIS DANGER books AND DR. DeBUNKO by by Marc Mason at http://www.comicswaitingroom.com/indies4.html

Nice review of the DORIS DANGER books by Troy Brownfield at http://forum.newsarama.com/showthread.php?t=94644

Nice review AND interview of the DORIS DANGER treasury by Rob Kelly at http://www.treasurycomics.com/gallery/misc34doris.htm

Nice Dr. DeBunko review by Leigh Anne Wilson at the Journal of the Lincoln Heights Literary Society http://liheliso.com/buzz/archive/00000680.htm

Nice mention of the Doris Danger books by “Matty-Matt” at http://www.sfist.com/archives/2006/12/18/the_decontextualized_adventures_of_the_superfisters.php

Nice review of the Doris Danger books by Johnny Bacardi at
http://johnnybacardi.blogspot.com/2006/12/bacardi-show-new-comics-revue-opinions.html

Nice summary of the Doris Danger books at by Paul Dale Roberts at http://forums.jazmaonline.com/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=71

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Thanks for reading, fans! Next newsletter will officially announce DORIS DANGER’S upcoming 64-page HUMONGOUS TREASURY, in stores July 2007!

Until then,
Rob Oder, Editor-in-Chief!
www.chriswisniaarts.com

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HAD ENOUGH? Ready to UNSUBSCRIBE?! We’re sad to see you go, but know that if you love somebody, sometimes you have to set them free. Just reply to this email with the heading, “If you love somebody, set them free.”

TABLOIA MAILER # 4650

EXCITING MYSPACE UPDATE!

Thanks to a world of eager socialites out there, Chris has been making some very close, very dear new friends at myspace! What good friends he’s become with celebrities, comedians, movie stars, famous bands, cartoon characters and company mascots or logos, a bunch of professional wrestlers from the eighties, and even people who we had always assumed were dead! Imagine the fun Chris is having with his living and dead and imaginary friends, as they begin hangin’ out together, pal-in’ around, listening to music together, discussing personal secrets, sharing relationship troubles, asking if they can drive him to the airport, having sleep-overs! Because that’s what friends do! If you haven’t stopped by yet to become Chris’s best friend, please be sure to visit http://www.myspace.com/chriswisnia right away!

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DORIS DANGER NEWS!

DORIS DANGER IN OUTER SPACE, featuring out-of-this-world giant monster pin-ups by Peter Bagge, Dave Gibbons, Al Feldstein, and JH Williams III, has been in stores for a few weeks now! A scant 16 pages/comic-sized/all ages/$2.50! If your shop missed it (and they most likely did, looking at our order numbers!), tell them, “IT’S NOT TOO LATE!” Tell them: “DIAMOND ITEM NO: OCT06 3628, if you ci vous plait!”

Chris sent out review copies, and we’ll keep you posted as those scintillating reviews begin pouring into the streets!

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DR. DEBUNKO NEWS!

There is no news at this time! Happy holidays!

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CHRIS’S FIRST WEB COMIC IS GETTING CLOSE!

DICK HAMMER: The Dailies! In the popular and too-often-requested newspaper-strip format! Mystery! Murder! Arson! Action! An attempted murder that leaves a man in a wheelchair! Suspense! Not one but TWO cases of amnesia! Mistaken identities! and love gone sour … DEADLY SOUR! Give us a few more weeks, fans! And then begin visiting www.chriswisniaarts.com every week or so … for DICK HAMMER: THE DAILIES!

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DIARY OF A STRUGGLING COMICS ARTIST
See it for yourself at https://chriswisniaarts.com/blog.shtml !!!
Chris’s blog recounting his adventures as a self-publisher are beginning to get some attention! His personal tales have been linked and referred to as “depressing,” “sad,” and “pathetic!” Also, the Xeric Grant began referring eager and excited potential self-publishers, calling us “an invaluable resource!” Presumably, that’s to help them understand just what a nightmarish hell of misery the world of self-publishing is! Our personal favorite critique came from http://tlonista.wordpress.com/2006/11/ , whose diary entry of Sunday, November 26th, 2006 read:
“Dear Crazy Future Self,
“I know you’ve always loved drawing, but don’t love it this much. [and here linking to Chris’s uplifting diary! Then continuing:]
“If you’ve still got your heart set on starving to death in a cardboard box under an overpass on the Gardiner Expressway, save time, effort, and the cost of art materials. Be a philosopher.”
If that’s not a validation to start reading Chris’s blog, then there can’t be one! Thanks for the kind link, tlonista.wordpress.com!
In case you’re wondering why there were no entries for a few weeks in November, here’s why! Chris’s blog site suggested he upgrade to a new version! When he did this, he found he could no longer edit his previous posts! He also found that he couldn’t add any new posts! It took him a few weeks to figure out just what a piece of $%?@*!! his upgrade was, and then to finally scrap it completely, and manually re-enter all sixty-plus of his previous entries!
When he first launched the blog, Chris was trying to pump out five or six diary entries a week to get his seven-year pre-history, and two-and-a-half year publishing history caught up to present! You can imagine how all that reading intimidated so many fans!

Now he’s only about ten months behind on his history! For this reason, Chris plans to slow to a leisurely and consistent one mere entry a week … FOR NOW! So all you readers better use that time to catch up while you can!

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VITAL DEVELOPMENT! RIVETING UP-TO-THE-MINUTE MYSPACE UPDATE!

We made a rushed and wrong assumption above, in our EXCITING MYSPACE UPDATE announcement! It turns out, Chris has asked a number of 1980’s professional wrestlers to be his friend, but none of them have agreed to actually be his friend! Only the great, legendary Harley Race, who you could technically argue is a 1970’s wrestler, wanted to be Chris’s friend! Naturally, Chris is saddened and shaken up by this “dis” of people he legitimately yearned to be his friends! He’s had to reevaluate his view of his own popularity, but he insists he won’t let it affect his work schedule!

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Merry Christmas from all of us here at Salt Peter Press, Fans! Except for Dr. DeBunko, who’s an atheist!

–Rob Oder, Editor-in-Chief!
Don’t forget to visit www.chriswisniaarts.com today!

________________________________
Wonder why in the hell you got this annoying mailer? Feel free to reply with the heading “UNSUBSCRIBE!” We promise not to tell Chris, what with him in his current no-professional-wrestlers-for-friends state-of mind!

TABLOIA MAILER #6789

Greetings, Fans! DORIS DANGER IN OUTER SPACE, featuring out-of-this-world giant monster pin-ups by Peter Bagge, Dave Gibbons, Al Feldstein, and JH Williams III, is at the printer now! A scant 16 pages/comic-sized/all ages/$2.50! DIAMOND ITEM NO: OCT06 3628!

Have you picked up your copy of DORIS DANGER GREATEST ALL-OUT ARMY BATTLES, featuring all-out war pin-ups by Dick Ayers, Sam Glanzman, Russ Heath, and John Severin? That’s another 16 page pamplet/comic-sized/all ages/$2.50! It shipped to your favorite shop early this month! If your shop missed it, tell them, “IT’S NOT TOO LATE! DIAMOND ITEM NO: SEP06 3539!”

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ITEM!
Myspace is not JUST a stupid place for teenage girls and child predators! And now that we know, Tabloia’s artistic hack, Chris Wisnia, has just joined in the fun! You can find him hisspace: http://www.myspace.com/chriswisnia, and he is depressed because he only has one friend (someone named Tom), and he’s desperate to try to make friends! He is consumed with anxieties of popularity! Help him now! Go to myspace and ask our insecure little guy if he will be your friend, yes or no! He’ll say yes!

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ITEM!
Jennifer Contino at comicon.com PULSE has just posted a lengthy interview of Chris at:

http://www.comicon.com/ubb/ultimatebb.php/ubb/get_topic/f/36/t/005749.html

MORE ITEMS!
My, look at all the reviews flooding in!

Steven Grant wrote a kind send-up of Dr. DeBunko!
http://www.comicbookresources.com/columns/index.cgi?column=pd&article=2626

A delightful comics review of Doris Danger in blog form! Listen to Friday, November 03, 2006 Show #40:
http://ireadcomics.blogspot.com/

Our good friend Glenn Walker outdid himself with reviews of Doris Danger, Dr. DeBunko, AND last year’s Dead By Dawn anthology!
http://www.comicwidows.com/alternation/index.php?link=0028
http://www.comicwidows.com/sweating/index.php?link=0065

Johny Bacardi reviewed Doris Danger and Dr. DeBunko!
http://johnnybacardi.blogspot.com/2006/10/its-about-time-its-about-space-its.html

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ANY MORE ITEMS?
Now that Chris has had a baby! Now that all the projects Chris frantically began, pre-baby, are in stores, or about to be in stores! What next?

FIRST PRIORITY! Pumping out pages for the second humongous 9″x13″ volume of Doris Danger Giant Monster Adventures, which will collect the two above-mentioned pamphlets and pin-ups, and feature a giant monster cover by Shag, and pin-ups of giant monsters by Simon Bisley, Sam Kieth, Michael Lark, Esad Ribic, and more!

ALSO! Chris is furiously plotting and scripting his upcoming WEBCOMIC: Dick Hammer: The Dailies! featuring Tabloia’s favorite Conservative Republican Private Investigator, in a Dick Tracy-style newspaper-strip format! As soon as Chris can figure out the complicated plot, involving mystery, murder, arson, action, an attempted murder that leaves a man in a wheelchair, suspense, two cases of amnesia, mistaken identities, and love gone sour … DEADLY SOUR! That’s DICK HAMMER: THE DAILIES! Coming to you soon, every week or so! Only at www.chriswisniaarts.com!

LASTLY! Once the two above-mentioned projects are up and running, it’s back at last to LIMBO CAFÉ, the story of an atheist who dies and finds himself in a Christian Fundamentalist afterlife!

BE PATIENT, FANS! It’s all coming your way eventually!

Rob Oder, Editor-in-Chief!
Tabloia Weekly Magazine
_____________________________
Want to UNSUBSCRIBE? Reply to this email, with the heading, “ENOUGH! REMOVE ME ALREADY!

Special note: NO STORES asked to be unsubscribed, following the last SPAM-I-mean-informative-newletter that we sent out! Keeping you informed … as promised! –The Tabloia Staff!

Tabloia Mailer #19613

Everyone give a round welcome of applause to the hundreds of comics shops across the nation, now newly receiving our informative and important mailer!

We recently made a back-alley deal with a shady-looking man in a trenchcoat, and got our hands on a bootleg list of indie-friendly comics shops! And we didn’t waste that opportunity! Not only did we add EVERY ONE OF THEM to our spam-list – I mean MAILER – but we’ve also listed them all at our website, at www.chriswisniaarts.com! Now all you fans can peruse the list, and then go flooding into their stores! If they don’t already, we’re sure it will make them like us and want to SELL OUR STUFF! Click on “friends of Tabloia” and make sure your local store is listed there, with the right address, phone number, and website! We’ll also keep you up-to-date, blow-by-blow, on how many shops furiously write us to “remove from stupid mailer!” (Fans welcome to unsubscribe too!)

NEWS!
In Previews now … DORIS DANGER IN OUTER SPACE #1, featuring Kirby-style giant monster action, and out-of-this world pin-ups by your favorite outer-space artists, JH WILLIAMS III, DAVE GIBBONS, AL FELDSTEIN, and PETER BAGGE! Enjoyable from Salt Peter Press/all ages/16 scant pages/b&w/comic-sized/$2.50! Tell your shop to order with DIAMOND ORDER NUMBER OCT063628!

NEWS!
At the printer now … DORIS DANGER ALL-OUT ARMY BATTLES #!, featuring all-out war pin-ups by war-comic-drawing veterans DICK AYERS, SAM GLANZMAN, RUSS HEATH, and JOHN SEVERIN! Also Salt Peter Press/All ages/16 pages/b&w/comic-sized/$2.50! It’s not too late to get copies! ORDER NUMBER SEP06 3539!

NEWS!
What a lot of press DR. DeBUNKO: DEBUNKER OF THE SUPERNATURAL has gotten! Chris has done multiple interviews and reviews, for your pleasure! Foremost on the list is his dueling podcast alongside Xeric Award Winner and Eisner nominee Jim Ottaviani, at www.skepticality.com, the official podcast of Skeptic Magazine!

Up next is an interview at www.jazmaonline.com!
Also check out www.eyeoncomics.com’s review!
Then go to www.sfist.com for another review!

And finally, we’re still waiting on a few, last, straying reviews that haven’t been posted yet, including Jen at comicon.com the pulse, and Glenn at comicwidows.com, so keep checking back at www.chriswisniaarts.com!

If you passed it up once or twice already, you daren’t pass it up again! DR. DeBUNKO: THE SHORT STORIES! Salt Peter Press/mature readers/32 pages/b&w/comic-sized/$3.95! ORDER NUMBER AUG06 3525!

NEWS!
Tabloia’s own artistic hack Chris Wisnia will be making an appearance at STUMPTOWN’s comic convention October 27th and 28th! You can get details at their website, www.stumptowncomics.com. You may know Stumptown by its less familiar name: Portland, Oregon! Pack your bags and buy your airline tickets right away!

NEWS!
The Tabloia website, www.chriswisniaarts.com, is adding exciting new features every week! Check out how popular Chris is in the “photos” gallery! Read Chris’s blog, “Diary of a Struggling Comics Artist,” and learn just what it’s like to be a pathetic, unsuccessful self-publisher! (More interesting than it sounds!) Look at all the talented indie artists who like to draw giant monsters, and click over to their websites and buy their stuff … and feel free to contribute your own picture of a giant monster! Be sure not to miss sneak peeks of Dr. DeBunko, Doris Danger, and The Lump! And more! Only at www.chriswisniaarts.com!

See you there, fans!
Rob Oder, Editor-in-Chief!

Tabloia Mailer #1963

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ITEM OF NEWS!

If you do only one thing today, it MUST be to order one or more copies of “Doris Danger Greatest All-Out Army Battles!” And we mean today, fans! Preferably in the next hour or so! It features all-new, never-before-seen adventures of your favorite photojournalist, Doris, as she meets, confronts, befriends, or cautiously encounters the US Army “G” Division, a weird Fez-wearing cult, Christian and hippy giant monster picketers, the Monster Liberation Army (also known as the MLA!), redneck vigilantes out at the Jefferson monument, and MONSTERS MONSTERS MONSTERS in the Jack Kirby-style fashion! Also features giant monster pin-ups by all your favorite all-out war artists, John Severin, Russ Heath, Dick Ayers, and Sam Glanzman! In stores November! But only if you order it NOW!

DO YOU KNOW WHAT STAN LEE HAD TO SAY ABOUT DORIS DANGER’S GIANT MONSTER ADVENTURES? Wonder no more:

“The title alone, “Doris Danger Seeks Where Giant Monsters Creep and Stomp”
should have warned me off, but I read it anyway. Somehow, Chris Wisnias had
performed the amazing feat of taking the minor masterpieces that Jack Kirby
and I had done and looking at them through a carnival’s distorting mirror.
I wanted to write the sort of thoughtful, philosophical blurb about
“DDSWGMC&S” for which I’m so justly famed, but after getting caught up in
its weird and wacky contents, no mere words of mine could truly do it the
injustice it deserves. Therefore, I’ll just add the one sentence that
applies to any horror or monster tale– “Read it at your own risk!”

Stan Lee”

That’s DORIS DANGER ALL-OUT ARMY BATTLES #1
Salt Peter Press
All Ages/b&w/16 pages/$2.50

THAT’S NOT ALL! COMING NEXT MONTH … DORIS DANGER IN OUTER SPACE! Featuring more of the same, and out-of-this-world pin-ups by Dave Gibbons, Peter Bagge, Al Feldstein, and JH Williams III! Order it exactly one month from today!

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ITEM OF NEWS!

You heard it here first, fans! As the website slowly becomes updated to perfection by ace-website-updater Micah Brenner, we have finally and officially launched the official Tabloia blog … “Diary of a Struggling Comics Artist,” featuring the self-publishing diary of our own artistic hack, Chris Wisnia! Don’t miss it! He’s already posted huge multiple entries, covering everything from 1876 to 1996, and he’ll be whipping out the rest of the nineties pretty comprehensively (entirely too comprehensively), until he gets to the point he actually saw his work in print, at which point he’ll down to weekly entries! That’s a lot of worthless reading, fans, so don’t get behind! Get a head start by popping over to www.chriswisniaarts.com and clicking on the blog, as soon as you’ve finished ordering “ALL-OUT ARMY BATTLES!”

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ITEM OF NEWS!

“Dr. DeBunko: The Short Stories” is at the printer as we speak, and should be shipping to your local comics shop the first week of October! Sales were awful, fans! Gyah, what pathetic sales! Those numbers may well keep Dr. DeBunko’s future adventures off the shelves for the foreseeable future!

IN OTHER DR. DeBUNKO NEWS …

On October 11th, Xeric winner and Eisner nominee Jim Ottaviani (“Bone Sharps, Cowboys and Thunder Lizards,” http://www.gt-labs.com/ ) and Mr. Wisnia have been booked for back-to-back comic-themed interviews, on “Skepticality,” the official podcast for the Skeptics Society (www.skeptic.com). Mr. Wisnia will be discussing ways to try and get a cooler, younger audience interested in the Skeptic Society (which consists of primarity over-fifty-year-old scientists, best-selling authors, doctors, magicians (like Penn and Teller), Pulitzer-prize-winners, and the general intelligencia…but he’ll also be trying to spread a wider recognition and appreciation of our comics medium to a group of people who may not otherwise think to look at comics.

The podcast will be available for free at the iTunes music store, or at www.skepticality.com on October 11th!

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TABLOIA CONVENTION APPEARANCES!

Chris will be at the Stumptown Comics Convention in Portland, OR, on October 27th and 28th! If you think we’re lying, visit http://www.stumptowncomics.com/ !!

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WANT TO UNSUBSCRIBE, FANS?

You have been sent this witty, much-sought-after, collectible mailer either because you asked to join, and/or because WE KNOW WHO YOU ARE AND FOUND YOUR EMAIL SOMEWHERE, AND WE REALLY WANT YOU TO LIKE US AND BE OUR FRIEND! If you have heard enough already, or are embarrassed to be seen with us, just say so! Reply to this email with the heading, “I DON’T WANT TO BE YOUR FRIEND!” and we’ll remove you right away!

Thanks for reading, fans! See you soon,
Rob Oder, Editor-in-Chief!
www.chriswisniaarts.com

Tabloia Mailer #8523

Sorry to clog your inbox with a second spam letter this month, fans! But you needed to know that comixfan.com has just posted a kind interview of our own artistic hack, Chris Wisnia, and a six-page sneak preview for his latest endeavor, “Dr. DeBunko: The Short Stories!”

Don’t delay! Check it out at http://www.comixfan.com/xfan/forums/showthread.php?t=39962!

A MUST-SEE!!! That’s not all, fans! Be sure and look below the interview! There you will find, FOR THE FIRST TIME, Chris Wisnia’s character publicly criticized, regarding his use, or abuse, of the word “whacko!”

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DESPERATE CALL TO FANS! We wanted to give you plenty of time to PLEASE TELL YOUR LOCAL COMICS SHOP HOW MUCH YOU NEED A COPY OF DR. DEBUNKO: THE SHORT STORIES! August 29th is the deadline for retailers to place their orders, and if they don’t order it then, they may NEVER receive copies! And if that happens, it’s a sick, sad day for all of America! And especially for Dr. DeBunko!

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NOTE REGARDING THE OFFICIAL CHANGE IN POLICY ANNOUNCED LAST SPAM MAILER! The policy regarding ceasing the use of graphic descriptions of Chris’s wife’s body parts in relation to her birth still stands! This despite obvious signs of disagreement following the announcement of the policy! What obvious signs of disagreement, you ask? FOR THE FIRST TIME IN TABLOIA’S LONG AND PRESTIGIOUS SPAM-MAILING HISTORY, following the announcement, two “Tabloiacs” asked to be removed from the mailer! We’re sorry to see them go, but stand by our decision! If you’re looking for smut, you’ll have to look elsewhere! Namely, inside our upcoming comics!

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PLEASE REMOVE ME FROM THIS %&?!!? MAILER!
Send us an email with this as your heading, and we’re happy to oblige, fans! Join the two others so far!

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Still with us? Then next time we’ll update you on the two upcoming DORIS DANGER GIANT MONSTER comics that will be out before the end of the year! We’ll also tell you what STAN “THE MAN” LEE THOUGHT OF THEM! WOW! Thanks for reading! — Rob Oder, Editor-in-Chief!

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“DR. DeBUNKO: THE SHORT STORIES” by Chris Wisnia

“In order to change the world and make our society a safer place to live, we all need to do our part to promote clear and critical thinking and debunk all the bunkum that pervades our culture. Chris Wisnia has pioneered a new genre of skeptical debunking through his brilliantly written and elegantly illustrated series of Dr. DeBunko stories that appeals to a whole new audience unreached by other forms of media. All skeptics, humanists, scientists, and promoters of clear thinking should have this title on their book shelves.”
–Michael Shermer, Publisher of Skeptic magazine, columnist for Scientific American, author of Why People Believe Weird Things

See the debunker of the supernatural in action, matching wits against misinformed, stubborn, backwater, uneducated and superstitious folk around the globe! Only he can hope to make the world a safer, more rational place, as he opposes beliefs in corpse-eating werewolves; cattle
mutilations; spontaneous combustion; sex-craved succubi, incubi, and the devil himself; and more! Collecting all Dr. DeBunko’s stories, including his rare mini-comic appearances.

” … The coolest, hippest thing to hit skepticism … ” – Michael Shermer (director of the Skeptics Society and author of “Why People Believe Weird Things”)

” … Perfect examples of deadpan humor.” – Randy Lander, Fourthrail.com

” … my favorite’s Dr. DeBunko … a stitch … great comic timing.” – Steven Grant, comicbookresources.com

“I find myself laughing … every time.” – Aintitcoolnews.com

” … Some of my favorite stuff.” -Comixfan.com

MATURE AUDIENCES/32 PAGES/B&W/COMIC-SIZED/$3.95
See August’s Previews for October release, under Salt Peter Press!

Visit www.tabloia right away!

Comic-Con Live Birth Update … UPDATED!
Tabloia Mailer #3083

Greetings, fans, and thanks for coming out to see the live birth at San Diego’s Convention!

Unfortunately, due to events beyond our control, the future son of Tabloia’s own Chris Wisnia, and his wife Elizabeth, spoiled the ultimate publicity stunt and didn’t get born at the con!

If, like hundreds of others, you flew down to San Diego specifically to meet and congratulate the eight-plus-month-pregnant Elizabeth, but you missed her, then Chris apologizes! There were simply more occasions than he expected, that he had to send her out into the muggy heat to get him food, or to transport boxes full of books, too heavy to lift himself, or that he needed her to push him back in his “cosy-chair” to the hotel and massage his stinky, corn-covered feet before his nap! But she’ll be back again next year, so make your reservations now!

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ANNOUNCEMENT! CHANGE IN POLICY!

Beginning immediately, as to the handling and communicating of the birth progress! Elizabeth has asked that we no longer tell everyone that she’s dialated two centimeters, or that her cervix is thinned out 80%! She doesn’t approve of the graphic nature of the subject matter for our more sensitive readers! She finds it personal and explicit as well! So officially, beginning now, we will no longer mention her vagina, cervix, or other intimate body parts, regarding the birth!

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NEWS FLASH! We bring you the news as it occurs … Literally while composing this update, OSCAR FRANCIS WISNIA WAS BORN! He arrived AUGUST 5th, nine days before his due date! Six pounds exactly, nineteen inches long! Elizabeth was admitted into the hospital at 3pm, and unearthly, speedy progress that startled the doctors had Oscar out and ready to begin reading “TABLOIA COMICS” by 7:45!

Obviously his birth date is close enough for us to justify and fully exploit reports of our LIVE BIRTH AT COMIC-CON, come next season!

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IN PREVIEWS NOW:

Dr. DeBunko: The Short Stories by Chris Wisnia

“In order to change the world and make our society a safer place to live, we all need to do our part to promote clear and critical thinking and debunk all the bunkum that pervades our culture. Chris Wisnia has pioneered a new genre of skeptical debunking through his brilliantly written and elegantly illustrated series of Dr. DeBunko stories that appeals to a whole new audience unreached by other forms of media. All skeptics, humanists, scientists, and promoters of clear thinking should have this title on their book shelves.”
–Michael Shermer, Publisher of Skeptic magazine, columnist for Scientific American, author of Why People Believe Weird Things

See the debunker of the supernatural in action, matching wits against misinformed, stubborn, backwater, uneducated and superstitious folk around the globe! Only he can hope to make the world a safer, more rational place, as he opposes beliefs in corpse-eating werewolves; cattle mutilations; spontaneous combustion; sex-craved succubi, incubi, and the devil himself; and more! Collecting all Dr. DeBunko’s stories, including his rare mini-comic appearances.

” … The coolest, hippest thing to hit skepticism … ” – Michael Shermer (director of the Skeptics Society and author of “Why People Believe Weird Things”)

” … Perfect examples of deadpan humor.” – Randy Lander, Fourthrail.com

” … my favorite’s Dr. DeBunko … a stitch … great comic timing.” – Steven Grant, Comicbookresources.com

“I find myself laughing … every time.” – Aintitcoolnews.com

” … Some of my favorite stuff.” -Comixfan.com

Mature audiences/32 pages/b&w/comic-sized
$3.95
See August’s Previews for October release, under
Salt Peter Press!

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Tired of receiving this spam mailer? Reply to the email, with the heading, “Remove From This Sucky Mailer!” If not, see you next time, fans! –Rob, Editor-in-Chief!

Tabloia Mailer #4786

MAJOR PUBLICITY STUNT:
COME SEE THE LIVE BIRTH AT SAN DIEGO-COMIC-CON!
A Comic-Con First!

BOOTH 2107, in the SMALL PRESS PAVILLION!
Listed under “Chris Wisnia” (“C” in the catalogue, for some reason!)

Greetings, fans,

Sorry we haven’t written sooner with an update! In addition to getting packed and prepared for the biggest con of the year, Tabloia staffer and artistic hack Chris Wisnia and his wife have been busy moving into a bigger apartment, in preparation for the birth of their son, Oscar Francis!

At the regularly-scheduled eight-month check-up, we learned of a major Comic-Con plot-twist, in the doctor’s own words: “OH MY GOD! YOU’RE TWO INCHES DIALATED, AND YOUR CERVIX IS THINNED OUT EIGHTY PERCENT!”

Talk about San Diego Comic-Con excitement!
Talk about dedication to the comics medium! Elizabeth and Chris are still going to be there! … If Elizabeth can only hold Oscar in until the plane trip Tuesday evening! Yes, PLANE TRIP! Because they would rather be in a plane with people equipped to handle emergencies, knowing they will be on the ground within an hour, rather than driving who-in-the-hell-knows-in-the-middle-of-where, with no clue where the nearest hospital is!

Be sure and stop by booth 2107! See how big Elizabeth’s belly is! Help us pay our impending medical bill by buying our comics! And give a big hand and lots of support to MATT SILADY, prospective baby deliverer, and creator of the comic, “THE HOMELESS CHANNEL,” for agreeing to help us with the booth, bathroom breaks, keeping a pregnant woman fed and rested amidst all the madness, and even possibly running a 10’x10′ booth all by himself, if we decide to run off to the hospital in the middle of the convention!

If you have trouble finding booth #2107, look for the huge sign of a giant monster (attached)!

See you there!
Rob Oder, Editor-in-Chief!

Tabloia Mailer #1974

Hello again, fans!

At last, THE LUMP TRADE PAPERBACK hit stores this week! More news soon, as we receive reviews, reader feedback, and critical attention!
Hello? Yoo hoo? Anybody out there? (The wind blows desolately through our otherwise still and silent offices, gently stirring unfinished comics pages while we desperately wait for some sign that someone picked the book up … )

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SPECIAL CALL TO ARTISTS, SELF-PUBLISHERS, PROFESSIONALS, FANS, COMICS SHOPS…anybody who’s interested!
After almost a full year of promising our tech-boys would do a massive revamp of our WEBSITE, we’ve finally added a BRAND-NEW and FUN WEBSITE FEATURE! We’ve set up a LINKS PAGE in the Doris Danger “Jack Kirby-style giant monster” theme! You’re all invited to contribute! Draw a sketch of a giant monster of your choice! If you’d like to link your sketch to a website or email, let us know! Your sketch is your link to giant-monster stardom!
What a fun and unique links page! Even if you don’t want to draw, paint, photograph, or whatever, please feel free to click over and see some of the great artists, indie-self-publishers, and fans who’ve contributed so far! Check it out at http://www.chriswisniaarts.com/fans.shtml. We guarantee it’s going to be so popular, it’ll get better every time you check in!
While you’re there, feel free to support the indie comics artists and friends who provided them! Visit their websites, read their comics, and buy their stuff!
If the link doesn’t work, go to our website, www.chriswisniaarts.com, click on either of the books displayed, then click “fans giant monsters” in the index.

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It’s official! We’ve submitted “DR. DeBUNKO: DEBUNKER OF THE SUPERNATURAL: THE SHORT STORIES” to Diamond, for August Previews and October Release.
Just confirmed yesterday, Dr. DeBunko’s and Chris’s idol, Michael Shermer, director of the Skeptic Society and author of “Why We Believe Weird Things,” agreed to “blurb” the publication! Wow!
Here’s the press release:
DR. DeBUNKO: DEBUNKER OF THE SUPERNATURAL: THE SHORT STORIES
By Chris Wisnia
See the debunker of the supernatural in action, matching wits against misinformed, stubborn, backwater, uneducated and superstitious folk around the globe! Only he can hope to make the world a safer, more rational place, as he opposes beliefs in corpse-eating werewolves; cattle mutilations; spontaneous combustion; sex-craved succubi, incubi, and the devil himself; and more! Collecting eleven of the master of debunkery’s adventures, including his rare mini-comics!

” … The coolest, hippest thing to hit skepticism since Lisa Simpson began reading /Junior Skeptic magazine (when Homer had his alien abduction experience) … ” – Michael Shermer Ph.D. (director of the
Skeptics Society and author of “Why People Believe Weird Things).

” … Perfect examples of deadpan humor.” – Fourthrail.com.

“I find myself laughing … every time.” – Aintitcoolnews.com.

” … Some of my favorite stuff.” -Comixfan.com.

Mature audiences/32 pages/b&w/comic-sized. $3.95.
See August’s Previews for October release!

* * *

Enjoy, and thanks,
Rob Oder
Editor-in-Chief and Proud Publisher of “The Lump,” “Dr. DeBunko,” and “Doris Danger Giant Monster Adventures!”