Welcome to the All-New “DORIS DANGER GIANT MONSTER ADVENTURES: The Ultimate (Semi-)Interactive Web Comic Experience”!
Wow, fans! Starting today … We’re going to try something new and exciting and somewhat interactive with the posting of our “Doris Danger Giant Monster Adventures” web comic!
As you know, Doris Danger was a photojournalist in the 1950’s who was bent on trying to prove the existence of GIANT MONSTERS!
“Doris Danger’s Giant Monster Adventures” were published by “Tabloia Weekly Magazine” back in the 1950’s, and many pages or issues have disappeared over time! We’re working with historians, archaeologists, anthropologists, sociologists, art conservationists, and a dental hygienist to bring you the most comprehensive, exhaustive (exhausting!) collection of Doris’s adventures available to mankind! But though fascinating, and an integral part of America’s history, many of these precious, vital documents (comic-book-nonfictive documents, but historical documents nonetheless) have been lost over time! The issues in question were at the time read and then thrown away or incinerated … in anger! The cheap, shoddy newsprint on which they were printed often decayed and evaporated into thin air! The original artwork was often eaten by tigers! The original files were often destroyed in a flood or attack of locusts! (For a more in-depth explanation, read volume 1’s “INTRODUCTION”!
When we began reprinting Doris’s adventures in the 1970’s, the stories were published out of sequence – out of necessity! Sometimes because it’s what issues we could find! Sometimes because stories simply weren’t available! Sometimes because thematically we chose to publish in a specific order! Due to this (unfortunate) story structure, we didn’t always get … THE FULL PICTURE! … until NOW!
Why
? Because FROM NOW ON, you won’t need to read issues simply in the un-chronological order you’ve been forced to read the PAPER-PRINTED reprints! NOW… you’ll have access to all these heaps of “digital information” in whatever order YOU, reader, desire to read! We’re going to link all the related sequences into easy-to-follow chains! You can jump from one page to another following your favorite “character” (Steve the former astronaut, Ruthless Turk Ruthless, Agent Mull the FBI mole, aspiring “World’s Greatest Actor” Dirk Doole, the Fezzies, the Hillbillies, the giggling scientists)! You can skip around to follow “themes,” such as “giant monsters,” “UFO’S”, “robots,” “mannequins”, “the monster liberation army”, “Africa”! We’ll link whatever vaguely similar pages we can find!
Add to this your access to original scripts, pencils, unedited “first drafts” full of unfathomable errors and changes, and the “ULTIMATE DORIS DANGER COMMENTARIES!” That’s right! As a special bonus … you’ll be able to read text features by our own artistic hack, Chris Wisnia, where he’ll break down story ideas, panels, and any little brainstormed hair-brained whim that comes to mind, page by excruciating page, with such relentlessly tediously in-depth scrutiny than you ever feared to suffer through, that you’ll wish you were DEAD!
And NEW! If you’re like us, and can’t stand reading because it’s such a waste of time… Well NOW you can enjoy exciting commentary VIDEOS of creative hack, Chris Wisnia, discussing the above commentary-style aspects of this project, in ORAL tedious, laborious, excruciating detail!… from exotic locations all around the globe!
(If you don’t wish to enjoy these commentaries, which will often give away shocking behind-the-scenes secrets or plot developments that you haven’t necessarily even yet witnessed, it’s so easy! Just DON’T click “commentaries”! Ignore it and click “next” instead!)
So enjoy! … but with patience, fans! For as we begin this EPIC, UNPRECEDENTED PROJECT, there won’t be much to read! There won’t be many links! … at first! For as you’ll see, it’s going to start off laboriously, agonizingly slow! But as we go, and with each new page of Doris Danger’s history which we manage to hunt down and post, adding a richness and depth to the “seemingly” random episodes , you’ll see the stories and characters and themes begin to fill in like a gigantic jigsaw puzzle before your very eyes!
Enjoy! -Rob Oder, Editor-in-Chief!